Johnny speaks...
from The Green Room |
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Restless
Johnny Wakeloose
Frank Cotolo's alter-ego |
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Finally, my bosses at SRN One are letting me write again. I was banned from
writing after the last piece I wrote was made into a flyer, duplicated and
dropped from a helicopter all over Southern York Region. The station was fined
and I had to work three weeks without lunch hours to make up the cost of the fine.
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But here I am again, courageous with my adjectives and aggressive with my verbs,
addressing the great audience of The Green Room, where I have been fortunate
enough to work, enjoying my time with all the citizens of the area, this great
place where I was left on a doorstep years ago and raised by the Grecks, a
lovely family with a penchant for pancakes.
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But enough about me; I will save all of those details for my upcoming
autobiography, which has the following tentative titles:
- It's Me, Johnny, Who Are You?
- Always Restless, Never Thinking
- The Man With The Large Left Ear
- Restless Johnny Wakeloose: The Man Who Lives At Random
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Anyway, if you have any ideas for a title, send them to me, care of this website.
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Now, back to my special piece. People are always asking me how I prepare to do
The Green Room. I tell them it is a long and tedious process that takes up much
of my time for the rest of the week when I am not doing the show. In other
words, I lie, because The Green Room is like a party. The guests show up and
your host, me, takes in the energy and goes with the flow. Then, everything
that happens is unexpected and takes its own direction.
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This format was used only once before, on a station in Weeboken, California.
That station was K-R-A-P. I worked there when it was K-K-P-R but once I went on
the air they changed the call letters to KRAP.
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After three weeks and a mob that attacked the station with torches and
pitchforks the station changed its format to Oriental String Instrument Music
and dropped its call letters all together.
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The Green Room, which is on live every Thursday night at 8 pm EST (unless I am
sick or driving a septuagenarian to a checkers match), is armed with The Random
Music Generator. This contraption plays the music you hear on the show. The
machine, powered by a solar panel attached to the head of Phil Hong, picks and
chooses the music that is played on the show with no regard to time or status or
performer or any specifics.
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This unique machine was gifted to SRN One from an anonymous benefactor named
W. Kelp Underguard. Other stations around the continent are poised to take a
chance and use it but for the fact that they cannot find someone with the
energy and verve and impeccable timing of me, Restless Johnny Wakeloose, to
make it work smoothly.
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Now it is time for a bath. I will do another piece if you send your requests
and suggestions to me care of this website.
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I love you all, especially you - you know who!
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Frank Cotolo... ahem... Restless Johnny Wakeloose is the presenter of
Frank Cotolo's Green Room. |
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