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Vice President-possibles prepare to debate
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Frank Cotolo
1 Oct 2008 |
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The Vice-Presidential debate on Thursday, October 2nd is on everyone's mind
today, even though it will be history and completely forgotten by this weekend.
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Republican Sarah Palin, the surprise entry into the 2008 campaign, and
veteran Democrat Joe Biden, the first man named "Joe" to be a heartbeat
from the Presidency if he wins, are an unlikely pair to cross swords. She,
the governor of Alaska, and he, a senator from Delaware, are like chalk and
cheese, rubber and iron, salt and pepper, and even a little like Laurel
and Hardy.
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Republicans fear that Palin will come off looking like Tina Fey's imitation
of the governor and Democrats fear that Biden, a known gaffer, will say
something so stupid that he will appear to be on heavy medication.
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Biden is known for speaking before he thinks and Palin is becoming a legend
for not being able to think before she speaks.
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"The debate will become interesting, mostly," says one reporter, "if you
concentrate on the difference in hairstyles. Biden's hair is ridiculous and
Palin keeps all of her hair bunched up in the area where Biden's hair looks
fake."
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Dr. P. Edmund Elikstein, a political scientist currently looking for an
inexpensive place to live, says, "A man and a woman debating about anything
is futile. Add political policies to the mix, along with the fact that men
are attracted to the woman in the debate and women are repelled by the man
in the debate, and you set up a few hours that, when you are finished
watching it, you wish you could live over and do something other
than watch it."
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A member of the McCain camp says, "Governor Palin is set to be herself
during the debate, though she will follow the directions her coach gave
her to a tee."
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A member of the Obama camp says, "We told Senator Biden to stay away from
verbs and to construct his sentences without using street names for
minorities. So we feel he will do well."
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But all the worry about being a heartbeat from the Presidency is
over-reaction, since rarely in U.S. history has a VP had to take the major
office and rarely, if one did, have those people turned out to
be unqualified.
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