Column Chronicles: Scourge of the red fire ants

Scourge of the red fire ants

Frank Cotolo
January 28, 2016

I hate ants, especially red fire ants that stay with thousands of other red fire ants.

Once, in Florida, I encountered the Solenopsis invicta, which of course you know is one of the most dangerous red fire ants on the planet.

Fire ants are vicious and they populate quickly. It is thought that one queen fire ant can lay as many as a thousand eggs that give birth to a thousand fire ants and if only one of them is a queen then that queen can lay as many as a thousand eggs that give birth to a thousand fire ants and if only one of them is a queen then that queen can lay as many as a thousand eggs that give birth to a thousand fire ants and if only one of them is a queen then that queen can lay as many as a thousand eggs that give birth to a thousand fire ants and if only one of them is a queen then that queen can lay as many as... Do the math.

Fire ants have strength in numbers. One fire ant can hardly to any damage while walking on a human body part. But if 16,456 red ants come along with him, there is a good chance the human body part they cover will be covered with white pustules that can become infected, as well as they will dearly affect the choice of a person thinking of wearing Vineyard Vines Flat Front Twill Shorts.

In Florida I witnessed one red fire ant move briskly from a man's wrist to his shoulder and by the time it reached his shoulder there were hundreds on the way to his body from a hole near where he stood. Red fire ants send out scouts to find food and the scouts often become attracted to human flesh and broadcast with their antennae to other red ants in their hill. Getting the signal, thousands of other red fire ants march to find the scout.

Lucky for me that I learned that once you kill a scout you will not be in danger of being attacked by the army in his hill. So I learned how to identify a scout. A red fire ant hunter in Tampa Bay told me when I see a red ant traveling alone that it could be a scout. To be sure, he said, "Look closely and see if the ant is wearing black boots. That is the dead giveaway it is a scout."

To be stung repeatedly for a long time from red fire ants is to risk going into anaphylactic shock, which can severely impair a person's movement as well as hamper their bowling average.

I left Florida solely due to the infestation of red fire ants in and around the apartment I rented. Even though the landlord offered me a huge discount in the rent if I stayed, I was not willing to risk being eaten alive as were a string of pets I continually tried to live with me. Indeed, red fire ants are the perfect reason not to live in a tropical region. I fear, however, if they mutate they may be able to find a way to live in cooler climates and then they will populate at biblical proportions and possible take over the Earth, learn to build spaceships and begin a conquest of our entire universe. It makes me wonder what is in store for mankind.

Frank Cotolo can be found hosting the talk and interview programme Cotolo Chronicles. You can send him an e-mail at this address: frank@148.ca.