Column Chronicles
 
The money pit of movie trends
 
 
Frank Cotolo
August 3, 2017
 
Hollywood producers are investors, not artists. They look to financially support projects that will produce profits for their stakes. This is why so many producers attempt to sensationalize on movies that become hits, all of which, of course, are financial risks in the first place.
 
But once a certain movie strikes it rich, movies with similar themes and, of course, sequels, go into production, as investors feel they are supporting projects that have already been proven successful due to one mega hit.
 
In 1996, "The English Patient" (a romance set in WWII), was a runaway surprise hit, winning top awards and more importantly, a ton of profits for the producers. This is a perfect example of how producers chase after current trends solely for the sake of cashing in. In all cases, no care was taken in the creation of script or for that matter, production values.
 
The following list consists of movies hoping to sensationalize on "The English Patient," all of which proved that trends may not be the best way to go when sinking money into cinema.
 
THE FRENCH PATIENT
 
A pilot for the French resistance movement during WWI or WWII (it is never distinguished) crashes in the African desert during an attempt to fly a wounded woman to a hospital. During the crash the two fall in love and when they both live through the accident, vow to walk through the deadly terrain and marry. But debilitating thirst separates them and when he is picked up by local tribe members he vows to spend the rest of his life searching for her. Starring Corky Willsmith and Jenetta Swam.
 
DOCTOR ENGLISH'S PATIENT
 
Dr. Elmore Terrythomas, a British surgeon, falls for a lady while he is operating on her in a WWII or WWI (it is never distinguished) ad-hoc medical post in Africa while German troops attack. When the Germans take the patient hostage in mid-operation, Terrythomas, wounded and left for dead, swears not to die and to spend the rest of his life searching for her. River Thisbottle and Geraldine Dinegerald star.
 
THE ENGLISH PAY CENTS
 
During WWII or WWI (it is never distinguished), a British captain turns in his pounds for U.S. dollars at a bank in a city being attacked by Germans. He is wounded when he leaves the back and has to be put in a local hospital. There, he falls in love with a nurse attending to him. When the Germans take the city, the nurse is re-assigned to care for injured German soldiers. Even though he has not recuperated, the captain bribes German guards by using his U.S. dollars in order to find the nurse, which takes the rest of this six hour movie starring Leslie Bacon Buttress and Cecilia Signoretti.
 
Frank Cotolo can be found hosting the talk and interview programme Cotolo Chronicles. You can send him an e-mail at this address: frank@148.ca.
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