Column Chronicles: Francodamus forecasts, part two

Francodamus forecasts, part two

Frank Cotolo
July 12, 2018

As I wrote in part one, there are some times when a strange and glorious feeling goes through me and suddenly I spurt predictions and, in a hypnotic state of super-semi-consciousness they are predictions of things to come. Luckily, there is always someone around to document what I say, thus, I present some of the recent predictions from that extra-perceptive being they call Francodamus...

I see a time when islands will no longer exist.

I see another time, long from now, and when this time comes, there will be a showering of oranges from the skies onto poor nations and Vitamin C will save thousands of people.

Some years in the future there will be a sweeping trend that will stun humanity and no one will seem to understand it but everyone will do it and someone will start it and then it will suddenly stop.

Decades will pass and no one in the world will wear hats.

So many, many years from now, long after you and I are dead, there will be robots in everyone's home and all of them will be named Slumbereeno.

Differently than predicted in The Bible, a flood will wash away two continents, except for two animals from each species, except insects, which will perish with all humans. Then, I see a time when there is a great drying of the floods and the pairs of animals from each surviving the floods, prey on one another until they, too, are dead, except for one penguin.

An eon will pass and in China a young boy will be born to parents that are blind, deaf and often walk into walls. The boy will have all of his senses and everyone will think he is a savior, at least until it is revealed that he cannot eat soup with a spoon. Millions of Chinese people will herald the boy, who they will call Wing Wong, because the name has a wing to it, and when the eon passes, he will walk through a bamboo wall and disappear.

Soon enough, sixty-two percent of all people on the planet will have artificial feet.

A long and tedious war will break out in the next millennium. It will last a long and tedious decade, killing hundreds of thousands in the armies of each side. A great general will emerge. His name will be Stella. General Stella will lead one of the armies to victory by making them attack without uniforms. The other side will surrender when facing General Stella’s naked army. Peace will come to both nations, except on Sundays, when rebel groups create a ruckus by screaming during church services.

Frank Cotolo can be found hosting the talk and interview programme Cotolo Chronicles. You can send him an e-mail at this address: frank@148.ca.