Column Chronicles: Continuing some King-sized thoughts

Continuing some King-sized thoughts

Frank Cotolo
January 24, 2019

After years of retirement, Larry King is trapped doing infomercials. His newspaper column is gone, as are many of the newspapers that ran it. I have been trying to convince some struggling newspapers that a King-like column, filled only with unique gems, could still be a winner. We continue with intermittent blog themes that inform, enertain and honor Mr. King's journalistic jingo.

Not many people live to be a hundred but those who do sure put a strain on the Social Security issue.

When the James Bond franchise turns fifty, they should remake Live And Let Die and let Bond die.

What's wrong with fast-food Sushi?

Automobiles that can drive without a human behind the wheel should be able to change their own flat tires, too.

How come no H.G. Wells science fiction stories ever mentioned the Internet?

Are bisexuals and their place in modern society a binary issue?

These days we still have astronauts but it's damned tough to buy a bottle of Tang instant orange juice.

How smart is a smart phone if it can die drowning?

The United States has always been a country divided because it has always had states.

When I was growing up there were no such things as hard water and soft water.

Comedy has its limits. Jokes about dementia are not funny. I know. I have it and you don't see me laughing about it.

Could you say that someone who hates Homer Simpson is Homer-phobic?

If you are truly conservative and alcholic, could we say you are a Right-Winer?

I miss David Cassidy. He never got his shot at singing old, tired standards like other rock stars.

I'm still waiting for a sequel to Ant-Man.

Frank Cotolo can be found hosting the talk and interview programme Cotolo Chronicles. You can send him an e-mail at this address: frank@148.ca.