Column Chronicles: Your genes define you

Your genes define you

Frank Cotolo
April 1, 2021

The genes you inherit from your bloodline give you traits. Those genes are called DNA and each strand has unique elements that guide how your body works, your tendencies to become ill and why you may be attracted to objects that roll.

Scientists have found specific behavior is inherited from studying DNA. Here are some examples.

If a person sneezes while someone is trying to suffocate them, it is highly probable that one of your parents suppressed feelings of jumping from a Ferris Wheel.

Can you sing any note to any song without being prompted by a key note? If you have what is called Perfect Pitch, chances are a few generations ago someone, a woman related to you made love to Baseball icon Mickey Mantle.

Some people who have a constant problem with earwax are apt to have inherited it from a member of their male bloodline who escaped from a low-security prison after being convicted of molesting oversized candles.

Grey hair is not exclusive to older people. Young people's hair that goes grey before the age 20 have an extra pigment in their DNA, which scientists label UR-34RR456.3, obviously. Also, researchers found other DNA pigments in young people that turn hair pink. That pigment is traced to parents with Punk Rock roots.

Arthritis may be passed down through a father that did not have it. Researchers have found near proof that the gene carrying Arthritis is sometimes bias and though it it present in a father's DNA, it decides it likes the father too much to give him arthritic pain, so it does not kick in. When passed on, though, the gene carrying Arthritis gets a bad impression of the offspring, male or female, and it has a field day producing pain in the new host. Researchers in Japan have indicated that when the passed down gene causes pain, it is also laughing with every pulse pounding beat.

A person whose father and mother died before the person was born does usually not inherit any DNA.

Women who have mothers with naturally curly hair will find it remains cleaner than other women who have to wash their locks at least twice a day. This is because the gene that makes hair curly also contains an element that repels dirt, being able to identify non-clean molecules with acute accuracy.

If a child is born outside of the womb, it most likely will not be able to identify its parents.

Children who might be able to play a piano without ever having a lesson are most likely the children of parents who could only have sex listening to recordings of Perry Como.

Frank Cotolo can be found hosting the talk and interview programme Cotolo Chronicles. You can send him an e-mail at this address: frank@148.ca.