Column Chronicles: Tales of past lives

Tales of past lives

Frank Cotolo
December 16, 2021

By popular demand, here are transcripts from interviews with people swearing to have been reincarnated and that they can recall past lives. Please do not share these stories with anyone else.

Mr. Blue, age 56
I am sure I lived as a pinsetter in the early days of bowling. It was in Kentucky. I found particular interest in the new game. I didn't want to play it; I wanted to set the pins up for others to play. I loved the pins. Go figure. I told players a bowling ball would be more effective with holes in it for fingers to grip it when they rolled it at the pins. I remember giving each of the pins names. Like the first pin was Ted, the second was Abe, the third was Carl, you know, like that.

Mrs. Turquoise, age 26
When I was six in this life, I kept running to the front door of our house to let people in, but there were never people there. My soul, as it turns out, was once that of a lady in Ireland who was a Knocker-Up. Those were folk who were paid to wake up sleeping people who had to go somewhere. There were no alarm clocks then. I hated the job so much I got drunk before my knocker-up tasks. Today, I am an alcoholic, so that proves it.

Mrs. Purple, age 47
I was in Pompeii when the volcano erupted. I died when a column from a building fell on me. Then I recall being a wife with twenty children. I died giving birth to number twenty. After that, I came back as the wife of an iceman who cameth [sic].

Mr. Black, age 93
I can assure everyone in doubt that there were dragons in the olden days because in a past life I was a dragon slayer. I had another life where I was a rickshaw driver in Hong Kong. I have had many lives as different nationalities, including a Croat, a Basques, a Somali, a Dane, a Cypriot and more. By the way, in each of those I just mentioned, I was a dog food taster.

Miss Yellow, age 19
I had only one life before this one. I expect to have many more because I remember the one life I had before this one. I was a scuba diving fast food deliverer.

Miss Pink, age 85
In all of my past lives, I died at an ages numerical order. In my first past life, I died at five. In the next one I died at six. Then I died at seven in the one after that. It went on from there, where I died in other lives at eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen... you get the idea.

Frank Cotolo can be found hosting the talk and interview programme Cotolo Chronicles. You can send him an e-mail at this address: frank@148.ca.