Column Chronicles: Kemo's adventures in chemistry

Kemo's adventures in chemistry

Frank Cotolo
February 29, 2024

In this column I will be writing about different topics now and then. My name is Kemo. I have no first or middle name and I have no proof Kemo is the family name so let's leave it at that.

My parents named me Chemistry because they swore it was the first word I said. My father also named our dog Chemistry.

Chemistry the dog and I ran in fields and swam in streams but Chemistry the dog drowned in a deep stream and died. I didn't die.

Grade school teachers would call my name and the kids would raise their hands as if the sound of my name was a question and each one of them wanted the teacher to pick him or her because each one thought he or she had the correct answer.

In middle school I shortened my name to Kemo and yet in the alphabetical school records my name still came up under C.

When I was drafted my sargeant called each soldier by his last name first and first name last. It was funny to the other soldiers when he shouted, "Kemo Kemo". When I told him Kemo was short for Chemistry and it was the only name I used he said, "All right then, private Kemo Kemo, get in the back of the line."

When I was a civilian again I got a job for a company that developed medicines solely because my original name was Chemistry. That's when I found out Chemistry is "the science dealing with the identification of the substances of which matter is composed and the investigation of their properties and how they interact, combine and change; and the use of these processes to form new substances.

Then I understood.

Watch for another of my adventures soon.

Frank Cotolo can be found hosting the talk and interview programme Cotolo Chronicles. You can send him an e-mail at this address: frank@148.ca.