Column Chronicles: Weird Want Ads - Frank Cotolo on 148.ca

Weird Want Ads

Frank Cotolo
May 21, 2026

Newspapers that once existed helped pay the bills by selling Want Ads for public perusal. There was rarely a rule as to what could be advertised for sale and even when there were rules people broke them. Here are some strange Want Ads we collected over the years.

WANTED
Socks with stripes. Prefer yellow on black or red and yellow on black or dark blue on grey. Must be horizontal thin or thick stripes. Nor more than five per foot. Nylon sock OK. Lighter than black is OK but no white with any color stripes or designs. No stripes that wiggle or are curved. One size fits all. Must be in pairs.

WANTED
Man who can repair rakes. We use rakes in our many fields and cannot afford to buy the quality of rakes we already own but have broken. Please be acquainted with all kinds of rakes including garden, landscape, leaf, thatch, shrub, hay and concrete. Some are custom made for rakers over seven feet.

WANTED
Women leggings guaranteed to display camel toes. Any sizes or colours.

WANTED
Book repair expert. We have old books with broken spines that need to be read by old readers with broken fingers.

WANTED
Maps of any or all Canadian provinces that can be refolded once unfolded. Must be unripped and not needing masking tape.

WANTED
A list of nouns in alphabetic order written on old parchment paper with ragged edges that was once in the possession of a large man with the initials F.U. Collectors will know what that means.

WANTED
Glue that won't dry quickly. Chewable and able to easily digest. Can be homemade.

WANTED
A portable bungalow. Single story design. No older than five years.

WANTED
People. Any kinds. For becoming the luckiest people in the world when needing one another.

Frank Cotolo can be found hosting the talk and interview programme Cotolo Chronicles. You can send him an e-mail at this address: frank@148.ca.