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Frank Cotolo
February 25, 2012 |
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Recently, our show's host was asked to speak to a large group of independent voters. This
thoroughly disorganized group is said to be the key to electing the next US President, as well
as the best group to prove if instant coffee products are moot in the current coffee market of North
America.
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Here is a transcript of the speech given on Feb. 13, 2012 at the Aggravated Associates Arena in
Frankenstein, Missouri.
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"My fellow independents and members of the middle community of this nation, unless you are not
citizens yet, I come to you with a heavy heart, untouched by Lipitor, to inspire you to reach out as
never before to grasp that which seems too far to be reached.
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"I am here with a message that is not a new message, nor is it one that is written in ink on
dog-eared paper of yellow. It was given to me by a greater power, which is not difficult to find
these days since I lost my last arm-wrestling match. However it is powerful and it owes nothing to
the fact that all of you combined have enough weight to tip the scales of the country literally,
not just figuratively. We're all independents to stand side by side in, say, Los Angeles, things
not securely embedded in the ground, from as far away as New York City, would begin to roll westward.
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"Your power cannot be denied and this message I bring cannot be folded small enough to mail to each
of you without two stamps on the envelope. Nor could I e-mail this message, since many of you won't
release your addresses for fear of spam. So I come to you to assure you that you have heard the
message, understand the message, can relay the message and will spell out the message to all.
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"Once, a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away, people like you and I were tossed like a bad side
dish on a political plate that wreaked of fowl juices and rancid odors, a blend of one view or
another that refused to stand on its own. We were mocked and ridiculed, we were left on the side of
the road to thumb a ride, not knowing our direction.
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"Things have changed and today we are the body of the new Medium-ism. Yes, you heard that right,
Mediumism. We are not small and nor are we so large that we are a mob. We are right in the center
of all political thought and all social behavior. We are not too sweet and not too sour, we are up
there but not out there and we can fit into any community that doesn't wave a flag only to the
right or to the left from hard winds of bias.
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