Column Chronicles
 
Defining economic collapse
 
 
Frank Cotolo
May 22, 2014
 
There are many forecasters of doom in many areas where doom may strike. Late last year I interviewed such a person, a man named Edward Fickle, who predicted that global financial collapse will occur this year. Here is that interview.
 
ME: How does one find signs of a devastating crunch in global economy?
 
EDWARD FICKLE: I don't like the word crunch, it isn't loud enough.
 
ME: Loud enough?
 
EF: Yes. Collapse is a multi-sound word. You say it and you hear crumbling and squeeking and scraping and you also hear crunching.
 
ME: All right, I will use collapse intead.
 
EF: Go ahead then.
 
ME: How does one find signs of a devastating collapse in global economy?
 
EF: If you are going to replace crunch with collapse you have to change the adjective. A collapse is always devastating; devastation is built into the word collapse. So the question has what I call a repetitive statement and that makes it sound like you are a bad journalist because you cannot put together sentences that are correctly produced for the utmost impact.
 
ME: Let me ask another question.
 
EF: Have you thought the second question out thoroughly enough to convey understanding to anyone who would answer?
 
ME: A lot of people couldn't answer the second question because they are not hone in financial matters.
 
EF: They are not hone? Are you overcompensating because you so poorly put together the first question so you feel obligated to make a statement using a verb ordinarilly used in a different definitive form?
 
ME: What's wrong with hone as a verb?
 
EF: Nothing, except you are using it to impress me as opposed to making my contribution to the interview the foremost object of our conversation.
 
ME: How about if I simply as you why the economy will collapse?
 
EF: You see? Simplicity is the key to intelligence. The primary objective exchanging language with another person is to be clear, not necessarily smart.
 
ME: You said exchanging language with another person and that’s not what we are doing here. In order to exchange language you must have two different languages. So you are wrong.
 
EF: That would be change not exchange.
 
ME: I think you are wrong.
 
EF: You think I am incorrect, not wrong.
 
ME: Same thing.
 
EF: No it isn't.
 
ME: Thank you for the interview.
 
EF: Are we ready to conduct it now?
 
Frank Cotolo can be found hosting the talk and interview programme Cotolo Chronicles. You can send him an e-mail at this address: frank@148.ca.

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