The Chinese Tea Price Controversy
 
 
Frank Cotolo
October 15, 2009
 
Recently, if not sooner, I wrote an article for The World Economic Report, a newspaper that costs too much to buy but has many readers (go figure). The ink had hardly dried before a critic replied.
 
The article is called The Price of Tea in China. The critic slammed me and wrote: "What's any of what you wrote have to do with the price of tea in China?"
 
Indeed, I write in my own defense, the price of tea in China has everything to do with the cost of the plant in that country. The critic, whose name will remain a mystery to anyone who has not read his byline, obviously misinterpreted the socio-economic ramifications of the generic phrase about tea in China and the literal definition of the phrase.
 
If I were to write an article about the politics of Brazil and the content was solely about samba music, anyone would have the right to say: "What's any of what you wrote have to do with the price of tea in China?" But my article is about one thing and one thing only: the price of tea in China.
 
But in any event, in all events and especially in this event, readers must realize that the critic is wrong even in a metaphoric sense. The subject of tea prices in China is always a universal question that represents a badly represented case.
 
For instance, what did Sacco and Vanzetti have to do with the price of tea in China? Judge Thayer said in summation at the trial, "Murder in the first degree is the gravest offense known to the law. This is so because of the statutory penalty of death." One may ask, "What's that have to do with the price of tea in China?" The answer is not simple because, for one thing, neither tea nor China were elements in the case of Sacco and Vanzetti.
 
However, a discussion of anarchy in the matter of Italian immigrants at the time of the case could very well support the fact that what tea cost in China had much to do with the unfortunate murder that convicted the pair, even though neither Sacco or Vanzetti may have enjoyed drinking tea, no less tea from China, no less having no connection to those who bought the tea which may not have even been purchased in China.
 
Also, we must remember that the phrase changes from culture to culture, never once affecting the purpose of my article. In fact, the changes strengthen whatever argument I propose in my analysis of economic issues.
 
So, in the U.S. they say, "What's that got to do with the price of eggs?" And here are some other variations:
 
Japan: "What's that got to do with the price of rice?"
 
Germany: "What's that got to do with the price of bratwurst?"
 
India: "What's that got to do with the price of curry?"
 
Russia: "What's that got to do with the price of vodka?"
 
Spain: "What's that got to do with the price of... hey, Japan is using rice? Okay, tortillas?"
 
Great Britain: "What's that got to do with the price of the princess' porcelin?"
 
Australia: "What's that got to do with the price of be-ahh?"
 
Sweden: "What's that got to do with the price of a sex-change operation?"
 
Canada: "What's that got to do with the price of timbits, eh?"
 
Mexico: "What's that got to do with the price of burro to a gaucho?"
 
Frank Cotolo can be found hosting the talk and interview programme Cotolo Chronicles. You can send him an e-mail at this address: frank@148.ca.
   
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